I ride the bus to work for the first time ever and my mom gets her nose broken by her dog. I’m not saying that by my attempt to save money on gas that my mom has gotten a broken nose. No, that is Megan’s fault. Megan is not the dog’s name; it is the daughter of Heather is my mother’s friend. In case you do not already know, my mother broke her nose and her wrist a couple months ago. Again, I blame Megan because she was there…the fact that my mom tripped over the dog is beside the point. If my mom hadn’t looked behind her to fine Megan she would have seen her dog cross in front of her as she was walking and thus she would not have collided with her lanky but sturdy greyhound.
The most recent event occurred while, again, my mom was watching Megan. The dog was playing with a toy and ended up ripping it in half. My mom, the neat freak that she is, reached down to pick up the toy and when she was about to stand up the dog crossed her path and her jaw collided with my mother’s nose. Okay, so it really isn’t Megan’s fault; but, she is the only other constant in the story besides my mom and the dog. Since the dog lives with my mom and doesn’t cause a broken nose every day I have to say that Megan is responsible.
Now, as far as my bus ride having anything to do with this—you ask? It doesn’t, it just so happens that I took our city’s lovely public transportation system to work today in an effort to save gas money. So, if a bus pass is $25 and I usually fill up my car every week for at least $37 this will save me quite a bit of money. I should be able to make it the rest of the month on the $10 I put in yesterday (I don’t drive too much other than to work and the grocery store). So, just for this month I should be able to save $113 in theory. I have tried to get my husband to take the bus as well; but, he’s a spoiled little brat. He came up with every excuse under the sun to not take the bus. Some were legit because he doesn’t always know when he’ll be getting off and sometimes the busses don’t run that late. The others were because he didn’t want to stand in the rain (if it was raining) because his stop is further away than mine…which it really isn’t, I just refused to argue. Though I offered no rebuttal he continued giving me excuses. I don’t know the schedules, I don’t know what time I’m getting off work, I don’t know how late I’m going to work out, I don’t know…I don’t know…I don’t know…you don’t know…blah, blah, blah {make sure you read that with whiney condescending voice}. His final words were, “What?” I informed him that I hadn’t said anything. “We’ll, you’re looking at me.” Well, duh, man! I’m not rude; you were talking to me weren’t you???? I always try to look at someone when they are speaking to me. Apparently this is something new to him. Oh well, just for that, all the money I’ll save is going to go into an account just for me!
So, this morning was my first ride to work on the bus. I have ridden the bus maybe twice before—way back in high school. Once to the mall and once to a concert where I ended up missing the last bus because I got on the wrong transfer (the driver was nice enough to deliver a friend and myself to a stop where we could be collected by our parents). To say that I was a little concerned this morning would be an understatement. But, I faired well and made it to work earlier than I would have had I driven (because, you know, I would have left late after oversleeping again). I even had enough time this morning before my bus to fry some eggs. I was even so nice as to make enough to share with any other member of my household who might care for some. Once on the bus I only had one person speak to me; which, is a blessing. You know, being as blond and beautiful as I am I am always getting pestered by men. I always skip around downtown singing “I feel pretty, oh so pretty…” I sometimes even dance a bit to try and keep most people at a distance. Nobody wants to get kicked from a downtown dancing freak. And then I puke on the nearest person because the whole display totally sickens me. Okay, that’s not quite true; but, I am a natural honey-blond. And one guy did give me the “eye” as he was exiting the bus saying, “Goodbye.” We’ll see how the afternoon commute goes…
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